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Terisa and Matt and Vera and Larry—along with Scott, who's also at this dinner—are not swingers, per se; they aren't pursuing casual sex.

Nor are they polygamists of the sort portrayed on HBO's Big Love; they aren't religious, and they don't have multiple wives.

Polyamorous: Kamala Devi (right) and Michael Mc Clure (center), have been married for 12 years but they both swore off monogamy - six months ago they welcomed 27-year-old Rachel Rickards (left) into their home For those who maybe confused as to what polyamory is, Dr Karen Stewart, a sex therapist in Los Angeles, said: 'Polyamory is not about being swingers.

It's not about the one-off weekend with the couple we met at the bar.

She was from Nebraska, and had never heard of such a thing. People across cultures have been loving more than one person at a time, engaging in multiple-partner relationships, and having open and varied sexual play for thousands of years.

Even the whole European concept of "courtly love", which our modern ideas of romance are based upon, is a fundamentally polyamorous expression.

Any poly person who says that being angry at being mistreated is a symptom of inadequacy or that being jealous is somehow a personal failing isn’t someone you need to listen to at all.

I’ve got some advice for both sides of the coin here.

Terisa Greenan and her boyfriend, Matt, are enjoying a rare day of Seattle sun, sharing a beet carpaccio on the patio of a local restaurant.

Suddenly it starts to rain, and the group must move inside.

In the process, they rearrange themselves: Matt's hand touches Vera's leg. The child, seemingly unconcerned, puts his arms around his mother and digs into his meal.

Ms Devi and Mr Mc Clure, who have been married for 12 years, say their aim is to continue growing their polyamorous community and 'potentially even get a hotel' where they can stay with all of their lovers combined.

My ex-husband and I had a relatively amicable divorce, and when he had started dating his new girlfriend (now wife), a mutual friend and I went to their house for dinner.

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